


(They Call Me) Doctor Love

by ZephyrOnTheWind



Series: They Were Neighbors [1]
Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Blind Date, Crush at First Sight, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-16 13:55:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14166339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZephyrOnTheWind/pseuds/ZephyrOnTheWind
Summary: Two idiots being idiots at each other without realizing it





	1. The Doctor at Work

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: You live across from me in our apartments and we smile when we see each other but we don't really know each other and oh you're the stripper at my friend's stag do/ hen night fuck this is really uncomfortable.  
> Via Tumblr

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: You live across from me in our apartments and we smile when we see each other but we don't really know each other and oh you're the stripper at my friend's stag do/ hen night fuck this is really uncomfortable.  
> Via Tumblr

You're glad that Nadia finally found someone to tie the knot with. And of course, since Nadia is involved the parties will be huge, including the bachelorette party. You're invited to the party, of course, and feel almost obliged to attend at least half of it.  
You get to the club, and are surprised to be escorted to the back room. A part of you had been sure Nadia would rent the whole club to have the biggest guest list available. Once you catch her eye, she breezes her way over.

"This way, they can get tips from us and from regular customers." You nod, but Nadia is already past you, greeting the next person being led in.

For the first half of the party, you stay curled up in your seat near the door, grazing on some snacks but otherwise playing on your phone. But halfway through, the music quiets for a moment, and you look up. The current dancers are leaving, and a few new faces start to filter into the room. Guess it makes sense that not all the dancers could be in the party room at once, and it's nice if the club to give all the dancers a chance at Nadia's tips. One dancer in particular captures your attention. He's taller than the rest, and his hair is a bright red that looks like it should be fake. Between the loose long-sleeve shirt, amazingly ridiculous thigh-high heel boots, and the eyepatch, you figure his gimmick must be something piratey. He looks familiar. You're fairly certain the eyepatch is part of it. Why is he so familiar? Not that many people wear one.

The new group begin to work the room, and your gaze idly follows him around the room, trying to figure out where you know him from. You snicker to yourself when you realize his shorts say juicy on the butt. Suddenly your brain registers that he's approaching you. Shit, did he hear you?

"Enjoying the view?" He smirks as he sits down next to you, gaze scanning the room in front of him.

"No, more curious about why a stripper would shoot for a pirate theme instead of normal skimpy clothing."

A bark of laughter escapes him. "Not what I had in mind, but now that you mention it-" he turns to look at you, and his eyes widen. "I suppose I could work it into my, uh, routine."

"Really? So what had you been thinking about?" A smile plays on your lips, wondering what could have caused the slight shift in his behavior.

"Well, ah, you see, my friends heard that I was going to be, uh, dancing for a party tonight, so they, um took it upon themselves to, well, in the end it was, I guess, uh, you could call it, er, a matter of honor?"

"So blackmail?" He starts to blush. Who thought strippers could fluster so easily? "Care to share what dirt these so-called friends have on you?"

His blush deepens. He looks away and mumbles something. You make out the words tramp stamp and saucy boi before the [music shifts](https://youtu.be/5Yja-pPZRMY). His eyes snap towards the stage.

"Well, that's my cue. I, er, hope that you, enjoy my, I mean, the, uh, show?" He stands up, making his way to the front of his audience. As the distance grows, his confidence seems to return, and he swaggers his way into the center of the room's attention. You can already tell that he's amazing at his job, even though you aren't all that familiar with what he should be doing. He even keeps the heels on for his routine, which makes you wonder how many times his friends have gotten him into this getup. The routine shows off all of the best of him, and his face shows that he knows it. The rest of the party is laughing and screaming along, far past tipsy. He had been an adorable dork earlier, and he could pull this off too? It sounds like a perfect package. You feel yourself beginning to blush at his more exaggerated moves, until your face is just a wave of heat. Oh no, he's cute and hot. And he had been talking to you. And if you stay he'll talk to you again. But now you know he's cute. Shit. Time to leave.

You decide you can deal with this never, and slip out the door as the song ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only now do I realize how far I strayed from the original prompt sentence. And if you want to know, the tramp stamp was a raven positioned like it was a butterfly, with the phrase Saucy Boi underneath it and random curly lines around it


	2. Neighbourly Help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: "My showers broken but I've got a date tonight could I possibly use your shower?" "Oh sure (neighbor that I've been crushing on for the last six months) of course you can use my shower to get ready for your date (fuck fuck fuck)"

~~Three Days Later~~

The wedding had been beautiful, and work had kicked your butt the day after. You had to pull a double yesterday, just to come home and find out that your shower didn't work. Oh, and that Portia had set you up for a blind lunch date. Even though you kept telling her not to, that no you don't care how cute the babies would be, you'd rather sit at home and eat ice cream. But you don't want to stand the poor person up.

Awkwardly, you go across the hall and knock on the door. When it opens, you launch into your spiel.

"Yeah, hi, this is kinda awkward, I know I didn't get you a moving in present when you moved in two months ago, but I really need to get ready for this blind date my friend set up, but my shower broke at some point yesterday and I had to pull a double, and I don't want to be rude to someone I haven't even met by not looking like I'm taking it seriously, even though nothing will probably come with it." As you finally pause for breath, and maybe an answer, your brain registers that it's the hot stripper from the bachelorette party, and he's blushing.

You suddenly realize you're in your ratty pajamas, and he's only wearing sweatpants, hair half covering his face. Your face flushes.

"Or I can cover myself in deodorant, don't want to be a bother, sorry!"

You turn to bolt back into your apartment, but he grabs your wrist, then immediately drops it.

"You can shower here. Don't want you to make a bad impression on someone you'll only see once!"

You look back to him, and see that he's blushing even more, but something in his eyes seems settled. "I mean, if you're sure. I don't want to-"

"It's fine." He moves out of the doorway, still holding the door open. You hesitate for a moment, then walk into his apartment.

You can tell that his favorite colors are black and red, since they're the only colors in the apartment. He leads you to the bathroom, even though the layout is the same as yours.

"Feel free to use my stuff, I hope none of it is too out there for you. Oh, uh, you might want to avoid the blue bottle, it may or may not be a glitter bomb. It was a gift and I'm terrified to open it. I'll grab a clean towel from, uh, somewhere I should have one I think? And I guess you know how to work the water since the fixtures are probably the same," he's awkwardly standing in the doorway, looking everywhere but your face. The blush has spread to the tips of his ears, and you're fairly certain yours has too. "Well I guess I'll, uh, just leave you to it?"

"Yeah, sounds like a plan?"

"Right." He's still standing in the doorway. "I should probably walk away. I'm gonna do that now." He turns and walks away, firmly closing the door behind him.

You inspect the room as you prepare for your shower. If he hadn't just walked you in here, you'd assume you were at the makeup and prep area for a modelling agency. The area around the sink is littered with small bottles and various combs and brushes. The bathtub is just as littered. Since your main concern is being not gross instead of stage ready, you pick out a single non-glitter body wash and a shampoo.

The shower goes quick, other than stray thoughts about your stripper neighbor that you try your best to shove away. You pull the curtain aside and begin searching for a towel, only to realize that there isn't one. You hesitate for a moment, then lean towards the door without leaving the shower.

"Hey, do you have that towel yet? There doesn't seem to be one in here." You hear muttering and a this from the other side of the door. "Are you okay?" You reach for the door handle from your place in the shower, not wanting to drip all over the floor. Your hand is almost at the handle when the door cracks open enough for a towel to get launched through. As you try to process what's happening, catch the towel, and keep your balance, you also hear the door slam shut.

"Sorryifitisn'tthecleanestI'llbeinthelivingroom," is what you think he just shouted.

You pause, shrug, then towel off before getting back into your pajamas, which now feel slightly tacky on your skin. You make your way to the living room, and find him trying his best to look calm and collected with a blush resting across his face.

"Oh, the eyepatch wasn't part of the outfit." You wince a little at that, thinking it might be too sensitive of a conversation starter.

"Is that why you thought I looked like a pirate?" A grin begins to stretch across his face.

You find yourself smiling as well. "Well, with an eyepatch and a poofy shirt, anyone would."

Both of you begin laughing, and every time you make eye contact it starts up again. Eventually, you manage to calm down enough to use words again. "Thanks you so much" you get out between giggles, "for letting me use your shower. I need to finish getting ready, but thank you." You blush again, thinking to yourself that you'd rather stay here than honor a blind date you didn't ask for.

"Never a problem! No, never! If yours is still broken tomorrow, you can stop by again! Don't worry about it! I needed a cosmic alarm clock anyway, or I would have missed meeting up with my sister!" With every exclamation his blush deepens.

If he has somewhere else to be, you don't want to make him late. He shows you to the hallway, you exchange awkward goodbyes, and you go back to your apartment.

"Fuck."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I guess the most used word that chapter was the most accurate: awkward  
> Also, it just keeps growing


	3. Blind Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did that blind date go anyway?

You sit on a bench just inside the city's public garden. Portia still hasn't told you much about the person your supposed to be on a date with, and stopped answering you messages ten minutes ago to "not distract you". But all she could possibly distract you from is the boredom of waiting for a stranger to walk up to you and tell them they were here to date you.

The games on your phone make a decent distraction for a little while, but after a few more minutes, you notice someone familiar entering the garden. His head swings wildly back and forth, as though looking for someone. You can't keep yourself from smiling, and you comment as he walks past, "I thought you had a meeting with your sister!"

His head whips towards you, and his shoulders relax a fraction. He smiles, and you feel your heart flutter a little at it. 

"Well, I thought you had a blind date to be on!"

Even though you had been telling yourself you didn't care, you feel your shoulders droop when he mentions it. You still try to make the best of it though.

"Well the friend who set it up has gone radio silent and the date was supposed to be here about, oh, 15 minutes ago. I was about to call it a day and just enjoy the garden myself. But what's your story?"

His smile drops a little, and his shoulders sag as you brush off your no-show date. He sits down next to you on the bench.

"Well I was supposed to meet my sister here thirty minutes ago but I got a little sidetracked. She said she was too but that she'd be here soon. Looks like I got here before her." The exaggerated movements he had used at the club and his apartment seem dampened now, and he keeps looking at your face and glancing away.

"Well I'm sure she'll be here any minute." You sit and fidget for a moment. "Would you, uh, like to wait with me?"

"Yes! I mean, yeah I'd be cool with that." He perks up, leg bouncing as he leans forward. "So do you come to the garden often?"

"It's one of my favorite places in town," you begin. "Some places focus on just colorful flowers and some ivy to hide the dirt, but here they have so many kinds of herbs! And the tree varieties! There's one tree that they've grafted fifty different species of tree onto and all of them bloom in the spring and the shades of color! It's just gorgeous! They even have a cactus section with multiple kinds of cactus! And with other plants from the area! And all the plants always look healthy and maintained and loved instead of hosed down and move along like some places! They just care so much and it shows in how beautiful the plants are."  
You pause to catch your breath, and glance over at him. The look in his eyes and gentle smile on his face make your stomach flop over, and you begin to blush and stammer.

"I mean, well, most, most places just care a-about flowers that are easy to, uh, care for, and don't really do, uh, variety."

At your change in tone, he launches himself off the bench, then turns and offers his hand to you. "How about you show me around?"

~~Two Hours Later~~

"So you're telling me you forgot that plants could be colors other than green? Including flowers?"

"We live in a city, I'm lucky to see grass once a week, let alone a tree! Wait, trees have brown."

You laugh, then check the time. "Oh wow it's getting late, I should head back."

"Yeah, I guess so- WAIT MY SISTER. Oh God oh God she's gonna kill me." He's pacing back and forth, tapping at his phone, a complete shift from the relaxed atmosphere the garden viewing had been. "Oh no she didn't even text me she must be dead in a ditch somewhere." He brings the phone up to his face. "Portia answer your phone!!! You aren't allowed to be dead!!! I'm calling again."

Hearing him say Portia's name startles you. You wonder why she would have tried to meet up with her brother she had never mentioned at the same time as the blind date she set up for you.

"Dear Portia, I hope you aren't dead, sincerely Julian. PS, pick up your phone!!!!!!"

"Wait."

He - Julian freezes, looking at you.

"We managed to meet three times, one of those lasting two hours, and you didn't tell me your name? Which happens to be the name of the blind date my friend Portia set up for me? Who you were supposed to meet here and you ran into me instead?"

Julian stands there for a moment, blinking. Slowly, he nods, and takes the phone away from his face.

"I cannot BELIEVE-" You pull your phone out and call Portia yourself.

"Hey, Portia! You forgot to tell your brother it was a date! Or tell me he's my neighbor! You owe me soooo much ice cream!"

You hang up, then turn to Julian. "So since she probably isn't going to show, do you want to walk home together?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please know that yes, Portia is safe and laughing at the voicemails on her phone

**Author's Note:**

> Only now do I realize how far I strayed from the original prompt sentence. And if you want to know, the tramp stamp was a raven positioned like it was a butterfly, with the phrase Saucy Boi underneath it and random curly lines around it


End file.
